CiViL Groups Programs
Small Groups – Twenty weekly groups, serving over 150 students at Stratford High School
Local Service Projects – Toy collection, home repair, school supply collection, pop-top collection drive for Ronald McDonald House
Hurricane Katrina Rebuilding Project – Two annual trips with a total of eighty-three student workers.
Breakfast & A Movie – A yearly character education experience for students that includes uplifting movies like “Coach Carter,” “Remember the Titans,” and “The Great Debaters.”
Shirt Off Your Back – A support drive to provide matching game-day shirts and ties for the Stratford football team.
CiViL Groups Accomplishments
Graduation Rate – When we started in 2004 only 38% of students who came to Stratford High School as freshmen actually graduated. In 2007 that number jumped to 72%. And has stayed within a few points ever since. CiViL Groups does not claim to be solely responsible for this improvement. However, we believe that we have been part of the solution.
Improved Grades – Several months after one of her problem students joined CiViL Groups, a teacher mentioned to Melony that the student’s GPA in her class had soared from the sixties (failing) to the mid-nineties, proclaiming with how much she “loved our new tutoring program.” Melony explained that we don’t do tutoring. We simply helped the student work through problems that were getting in the way of her performance in school.
Improved Student-Teacher Relationships – A male student complained in group that he was not doing well in class because his teacher didn’t like him. He said that she always frowns at him and seems to be consistently critical and disapproving. We discussed the situation and agreed that, while he couldn’t change the teacher, he could do a few things to improve the relationship. He was challenged to smile and greet her pleasantly when he entered class. A few weeks later I asked him how things were going with that teacher. He said, “It worked! She smiles at me now, and she’s nicer to me all the time.”
Improved Student-Parent Relationships – A student was angry and deeply sad that his step father communicated only by yelling at him. The student wanted to run away or fight his step father. Instead, as a result of several weeks of discussions in CiViL Groups, the student decided to do his part to make the relationship better, choosing to co-operate with instead of defy his step father. The relationship problem took some years to resolve, but by the time he was a senior, the boy was working with his step father to start a new family business, while getting ready to graduate. When asked about his difficulties, the student said they had worked things out. No desperate act was necessary to bring about this change, only wisdom and patience.
Improved Student-Student Relationships – Several girls from the same CiViL Group got into a conflict outside of group. When it was time for group to meet, it took some convincing to get them to come. During the meeting their facilitator taught them to listen to each other, talk through their differences, and, when they were ready, to forgive one another. Afterwards one girl said, “No one has ever said, ‘I forgive you,’ to me before.” Odds are that no one had ever taught her to ask. Both are essential relationship skills.
Improved Life Situations – A student was being physically abused by a raging father. He came to his CiViL Groups facilitator and told him about the situation. As required by law, the facilitator reported the incident to the Department of Human Services. An investigation was initiated on behalf of the student. Improved Life
Decisions – A CiViL Groups student left group at the end of the period, only to return a few minutes later. In the school bathroom he had seen a student that he knew had taken part in beating up his younger brother. He asked his facilitator to tell him why he shouldn’t go back and beat up that student. They talked about the issue for nearly an hour, during which time, the student decided that the satisfaction of getting revenge was not as important as staying out of jail, graduating and going on with his life. He graduated later that year.
Improved Attitudes – A few days after we returned from our first Hurricane Katrina Rebuilding Trip, the mother of one of our students called and asked, “Where is my son? The boy you brought back looks like my son, but he’s not. The one you brought back is respectful to me, grateful for what he has, willing to work hard, and excited about improving his grades. What did you do to him?” All we did was show him how difficult life was for the survivors of Katrina and offer him an opportunity to pitch in next to them as they worked to rebuild their lives. He learned the rest by himself.
Help with Preoccupying Problems – A student came to group saying that he just couldn’t cope anymore, and he needed to talk to someone. During the previous year he had lost five people who were close to him. The most recent loss was a Step-Father who had loved him like a son. The student believed that a man should be strong and hold all his grief inside, so others wouldn’t be burdened with his sorrow. He just couldn’t be that strong, and he felt ashamed. The facilitator helped him talk about his lost loved ones, assuring him that it was right for a man to grieve the loss of those who have meant so much to him. The student was able to grieve openly in a safe setting. That expression helped him move on through the grieving process. As he was able to grieve his losses, they preoccupied him less and less. He graduated the next year and is now in college.
Positive Community Recognition – Students in urban schools are often stigmatized by the community as dangerous, criminal, low class, or stupid. They are aware of society’s disapproval, and it hurts, angers, or discourages them. In 2007 the students of CiViL Groups at Stratford High School were chosen to by Hands On Nashville to receive the Mary Catherine Strobel Award for Volunteer Group of the Year. Because of the generosity of our supporters, all 130 students were able to attend the awards banquet where they met other volunteers from all parts of Middle Tennessee. During the description of their work, the audience broke into spontaneous applause several times. When they won, they were given a standing ovation. A celebration photo, accompanied by a glowing write up appeared in the local newspaper. After, the banquet one student said, “I never knew would feel so good to do the right thing.”